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The Start-Up Page 8
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The continued on the trail in comfortable silence. Fi broke the silence. “Thank you for taking me out here. I love it.”
Crawford said, “I haven’t been out here with anyone since…” His stopped himself. “Never mind. You don’t want to hear it.”
Fi tugged on his hand. “No, I do. It’s okay. You can talk about it.”
Crawford exhauled slowly. “I used to hike a lot with GIRLFRIEND. She actually thought the history of this place was cheesy.” He chuckled softly. “I could never admit to her that I thought it was sweet. I’m not supposed to think things are sweet or romantic, right? Big Aussie guy like me.”
Fi shook her head. “I like that you like sweet and romantic things. You’re allowed to enjoy cheesy things even if you are a big ol’ outdoor man.”
“I always felt like I couldn’t truly be myself with her. She had an idea of what kind of man she wanted, and how she wanted me to be. I never measured up.”
Crawford sounded a lot like Fi did when she talked about Trevor. They seemed to share the same unfortunate relationship histories with partners who weren’t supportive. His tone felt familiar. However, Fi couldn’t shake the feeling that Crawford still cared for his ex. As the continued to walk through the lovely forest and on the romantic path, she tried to tell herself that she was there now with Crawford and GIELFRIEND wasn’t. She walked next to him now. She was the woman he took on romantic heights. GF was long gone.
But she couldn’t help but hold doubt in her heart. What if she was in GF’s place simply because she didn’t want to be? Was Fi a stand in for the woman Crawford really wanted?
As they ambled down the picturesque lane, Fi’s doubts grew louder in her ears. She wondered if Crawford was reminiscing about GIRLFRIEND as they walked hand and hand.
When the reached a footbridge, Crawford stopped and took her in his arms. She wanted to be in the moment with him. He leaned down and kissed her. She wanted to kiss him back with the same passion he kissed her, but her mind was rambled on with possible scenarios to what Crawford’s true feelings were. After a few moments, she pulled away after only giving a half-hearted kiss back.
Chapter 17
Fi’s doubts continued to consume her, no matter what she did. She tried positive love affirmations.
You are a person worthy of love.
Open your heart to the love around you.
The universe will bring you love if you believe you deserve it.
None of the affirmations helped.
She couldn’t talk with Tess about her relationship situations because it was so non-traditional. She hated to keep something like having three boyfriends from her best friend, but she was a little embarrassed. It was certainly an unconventional situation and likely anyone who heard her doubts would only agree with her.
Part of her wanted to believe that it would work. For the most part, it was working.
A little voice of doubt had appeared after the odd ending do a fabulous day with Blaine. She couldn’t piece together how the Blaine out on the water was completely different from the Blaine at the yacht club. He was smarmy with these women. He hadn’t even introduced her. It made her feel so small.
The little voice of doubt spoke louder that ever to her after the hike with Crawford. He hadn’t said outright that he still loved his ex-girlfriend, but Fi sensed he did. They’d been together so long. Could she trust that he was over her?
Adam seemed wholly smitten with her. Although she wondered if she was enough for him, too. He was a man that likely wanted a woman he could respect. Was his praise for her engineering prowess from a place of veracity? Or was he saying that to make her feel better?
He praised her during the capoeira session with the high school kids. She kept falling on her ass, but he kept saying how good he was doing. What if Adam told her how great she was but didn’t really mean it?
These thoughts swirled around her head during her dentist appointment when she had nothing to do but stare up at the ceiling while her teeth were cleaned. She had plenty of time to analyze and re-analyze her interactions with each man. Her heart ached at the prospect that they were not as invested in her as she was in them.
After ruminating the entire appointment about them and the worst case scenarios, she forced herself to dismiss her doubts. It was still early in their relationship. They had kinks to work out. She had nothing to worry about.
She stopped by the coffee shop where she had her first interview with the guys. She pointedly decided to go there before heading into the office to reminisce about that first meeting. So much had changed since then!
When she walked in CHANGECAFÉ, she saw Blaine immediately. His back was turned away from her, but it was undoubtedly him. His briefcase was on the floor next to him. She would have gone up to him right away, but the gorgeous woman who sat across from him stopped her.
From the door, Fi could see how stunning she was. She was tall and lean, like a model with big pouty lips. Fi couldn’t move from where she stood.
A man came in behind her. “Excuse me.”
“Sorry,” Fi mumbled as she stepped to the side.
Fi tried to not think of the worst scenario. It was right in the middle of the day. He couldn’t possibly be on a coffee date, could he? He had his briefcase. Maybe he was having a meeting with the beautiful woman.
She took a deep breath and convinced herself that any of those reasons was plausible. She should walk up to the table and say hi like any normal girlfriend would.
She took one step forward but stopped right in her tracks. Blaine reached across the table ad squeezed the woman’s hand. The woman wiped a tear falling down her cheek. They were having a heartfelt moment righr before her eyes!
Fi spun around and sprinted out of the coffee shop nearly knocking down a woman on her way in.
“I’m sorry! So sorry!” she said as she hurried to her car.
Fi tried to calm herself. She couldn’t jump to conclusions. Just because she had caught Trevor red handed cheating on her didn’t mean that was happening again.
Oh my God. Was it happening again?
She sat in her car shaking with tears streaming down her face. After a few minutes of throwing herself into despair, she told herself that the only way to know for sure was to confront Blaine herself.
She drove to the house ready to handle the situation like an adult. There was no reason to be hysterical over something she didn’t know the whole story about.
She walked into the house ready to push past her emotional hysteria and get to work. Blaine would soon be home anyway. She could confront him about what she’d seen. There was no reason to fret about it now.
In the foyer, she heard Adam talking.
“We are looking for someone to start right away.”
The other voice was on speaker. “Okay. I’ll let you know tomorrow. Is that okay?”
“Sure. That’s fine!”
“It might be difficult for me to start full time without giving my current job a full two weeks notice.”
Adam said, “completely understandable. If you need to start part time with us and stay at your current job, that’s fine. We really need someone to help our engineer we have on staff right now.”
Fi felt her chest shatter into pieces. They needed almond to help their parents engineer? Adam was talking about her.
She stood in the front room glued to the floor as her body went flush with shame. Adam had been lying to her. He said that she was such a great engineer and asset to the company, but she needed help!
Hot tears rolled down her face. She fought to keep them back, but she couldn’t. Adam lied to her. He boosted up her abilities because he felt sorry for her. Or worse as a way to sleep with her. None of anything he ever said to her was genuine.
She quietly walked out of the house. She couldn’t be there. She couldn’t face him after hearing what she did.
She hurried down the steps, wiping tears down her face. She ran into a woman coming up the walk.
“Oh, poor baby! Are you one of Blaine’s girls?”
Fi stared at the woman, in shock of her brashness.
When she said nothing, she shrugged. “Don’t worry. Blaine could never love any one woman. It’s not just you.”
Fi shot back. “And Who are you?”
The woman’s face twisted into disgust. She put her hand on her hip. “Excuse me? The real question is: who are you? I love her.”
“You live her?” Fi asked incredulously.
The woman cocked her head from side to side. “Well, I’ve been gone for a while, but I’m moving back in.”
“That doesn’t answer who you are.”
Her eyes narrowed. “I’m Crawford’s girlfriend! That’s all you need to know.”
Fi now recognized the woman. It was GIRLFRIEND.
GIRLFRIEND pushed past her. “Run along now. You obviously don’t belong here.”
Fi ran to her car. All this time, they had all been lying to her. She lost everything. She could never work for Luv Maite again, a project she genuinely cared about and believed in. She could never see the guys again.
Chapter 18
In the shower, Crawford thought about how happy he’d been in the last few weeks. Opening up to Fi and admitting his feelings for her had lifted a huge weight off of his chest. It was easier to recognize his feelings instead of shutting them away.
The road to happiness had been a difficult one. His hesitation stemmed from finally letting Tina go. She’d been a facet in his life for five years. Their tumultuous relationship had given him more heartache than happiness, but it was something he was used to.
Tina’s flighty habit of breaking up with him, running off with some other guy, and then coming back to him had turned into some kind of strange rock to count on. She’d always come back to him. It was a given. It was something he could count on.
It took meeting Fi, a humble woman, who emanated kindness to realize that there was a better way to live.
He heard the bathroom door open. With his head under the water, he heard, “Honey! I’m home!”
Speak of the devil! Fi was here. He closed his eyes and rinsed the shampoo out of his hair.
His back was turned when the shower door opened. He felt a hand wrap around his cock from behind.
“I missed you.”
Crawford turned around ready to show Fi how much he was grateful to have her in his life, but when he turned around, it wasn’t Fi. It was Tina.
He stepped back away from her and pried her hands off his cock. “What are you doing here?”
Tina looked hurt. “That’s no way to say hello.”
She stepped forward to touch him, but Crawford side stepped her. “What are you doing here, Tina?”
“I got your email,” Tina said crossing her arms and covering her breasts.
“That doesn’t explain why you are naked in my shower.”
“Our shower. I’m home now,” she said with a smile. “Congratulations on being a finalist for Z-Combinator by the way. It looks like your little business is finally going somewhere! I’m so proud of you.”
Crawford turned off the shower. “Gee, thanks. I’m so glad you’re finally proud of me.” He walked out of the shower, leaving Tina alone.
Grabbing a towel, he wrapped it around himself. “You shouldn’t be here.”
Tina stepped out of the shower and stood naked. Crawford averted his eyes and handed her a towel. “You can’t just come here like this.”
Tina reluctantly grabbed the towel. “You told me to come!”
“I told you to come get the rest of your stuff. You never answered my email. You can’t just show up whenever you like!”
“I have a key!” Tina protested.
“I need that back. Thanks for reminding me.”
Tina whimpered. “Why are you being like this? Everything is fine now. Everything is working out. I’m back. You have nothing to worry about!”
Crawford stormed out of the bathroom. “You are unbelievable.”
She followed him out. “But that’s what you love about me!”
Crawford kicked at a box on the floor. “I packed up all your stuff. You can take it on your way out.”
“Why would you do that?” Tina said, staring at the box.
“Because I’ve moved on,” Crawford answered.
“That’s not possible! What? Are you mad at me for running off with that guy? He was nothing to me. It was just for money. Did you really expect me to live like a poor person with you while you were figuring out your company? Come on! You know I’m better than that. And now, you will be getting paid. So, none of it matters. I’m here!” She put her arms around Crawford’s neck, letting her towel fall to the floor.
Crawford felt Tina’s large warm breasts against his body. He had been in love with Tina for so long.
When she left, it broke him. She grabbed his face to look at her. “I’m back, baby.”
No matter their past and how much he had loved her. He no longer was in love with her. He loved Fi. He grabbed Tina’s hands and removed them from his face. Stepping back from her, he said, “It’s over, Tina. I’m in love with someone else.”
Tina’s face filled with shock. “Someone else? Who?”
Crawford sighed. “It doesn’t matter who. Actually, she will be here any minute. I don’t want you here when she is.”
Tina snapped. “It’s not that girl that was here earlier, is it?”
Crawford asked, “Fi?”
“Is that her name? Fi?” Tina screeched. “Well, I took care of her. I told her to get lost, and that weak little bitch left! She left!”
“What? You can’t do that! She belongs here. You don’t!” Crawford scrambled to get his clothes on.
Tina voice broke. “I can’t believe you said that!”
Crawford pulled on a t-shirt. “Tina, it’s over. Give me the key.”
Tina bit her lip. “Can’t we work it out?”
He sat on the bed, putting on his shoes. “It’s too late for that. I need the key.”
Tina grabbed her purse. “You are going to regret this!” She threw the key at him.
Crawford caught the key in the air. “Thanks. Now, get out.”
Chapter 18
Fi could do nothing but cry when she got back to her place. She knew all of it was too good to be true. Landing even one of the guys was far fetched, but did she really think all three of them wanted her? That they cared for her?
In extreme emotional distress, she always talked it over with Tess. She hadn’t even told her about her relationships in the first place. There was no use in bringing it up with her now that everything had blown up in her face.
She heard a knock on door. She couldn’t bring herself to open it, even it was the UPS man. She stayed put on the coach, wallowing in her tears. The doorbell rang. And then again. After a few moments, it rang three more times.
She got up from the couch and crept to the door. She’d never seen such a persistent UPS man.
“Fi. It’s Crawford.” He knocked on the door again.
Although there was no way, he could see her through the door, Fi dropped to her knees.
“You have to let me explain,” Crawford continued.
He rang the doorbell again.
“Please. Please let me explain. I’m not going to leave until I talk to you.”
Fi got up from her hiding position and opened the door. “What are you doing here? Where’s Tina?”
“Let me explain,” Crawford pleaded.
“It’s fine. You don’t have to. You two have history together. I completely understand why you two got back together.”
Crawford: “We didn’t get back together.”
“Why was she there? You obviously wanted to see her.” Her eyes mist over. “I can’t deal with this right now.”
“I called her and asked her to come over to finally get the rest of her stuff. I moved on.”
She freezes, mulling this over. Then she turns to him. “I don
’t want to be your second choice. She still has feelings for you. Otherwise, she wouldn’t have said you two were back together.”
“I don’t care what she said.”
“I do. I don’t want to be your rebound. You two have a long history together, and if there is something there, you should work it out. Why else have you kept her pictures up on the wall and her things in your closet? You weren’t completely moved on when we started this.”